Archive | March, 2017

VENUS Retro 2017: Discovering the RElationship ‘Story Line’ of Co-dependences, and REleasing it with Love!

4 Mar
Dear Friends in Cosmic Consciousness,
as I’ve been welcoming the VENUSian Turning Point into ‘her’ internal retro mode (the shift was at 1:09 am!), I’ve been reflecting on the patterns and experiences – the ‘story line’ of the previous VENUS Retro phases (every 18 months). There is an inner thread between VENUS Retro phases.

I often re-connected with significant others, and found the deeper truth of the relationship which could lead to transformation and often release…


If you’d like to tune in too, and find clues, here’s the line-up of the last three VENUS Retro phases, since the BIG one – the ‘VENUS Passage’ over the Sun disk in early June 2012 – remember?
May 15 – June 27, 2012
Dec 21, 2013 – Jan 31, 2014
July 25 – Sept 6, 2015


Of course, you are also welcome to explore old REcurring patterns that may REsurface now, to be REleased with LOVE, in a private Astrology session.
Send me a message (to, and we customize one that fits you!
Also yesterday evening, I came across a substantial, clear piece that is very apropos the Venus Passage we are just entering.
Hope it will be affirming, helpful, and inspiring to you. And YES, it takes practice…
The purpose of VENUS retro is to transform from the recent Evening Star quality (Libra undertone) into a Morning Star (Taurus undertone) / Goddess of the Dawn:
In the retro phase it’s time to release esp. co-dependency (which also the Solar Eclipse in PISCES, surrounded by several PI planets confirm, and where VENUS goes back to).
We tend to project denied parts of ourselves onto another, and re-attract them because of the charge and ‘contract’ we hold.
Let’s direct the freed up energy into so(u)lar conscious self radiating (VENUS infused by the SUN) Being and Loving, full of natural self worth (‘Morning Star’ Taurus undertone), like nature in Spring, or a pure lotus flower in the light.

SO much is opening and emerging now, and we can choose to walk in that direction…

Bali Lotus Morning Prayer HH

Early Morning Prayer – Lotus with Orb – Photography by Helga Hendricks

Here is that piece I mentioned above. It is apparently an excerpt from an interview that movie star Gwyneth Paltrow did with Gay and Katie Hendricks for her popular blog about this topic.
What is a conscious relationship?
  • “A conscious relationship is one in which people are awake to themselves, their feelings and thoughts, and are open to the flow of love and attention with one another.
  • “In a conscious relationship, you can be completely yourself AND completely connected.
  • “In a co-dependent relationship, you have two halves trying to become whole: one person who doesn’t love him/herself trying to get the other person to love them anyway.” 
  • voyager-vi-lovers-with-text

    Voyager Tarot VI Lovers


What are some examples of co-dependent vs. conscious behavior?


1. Co-dependent: “You have difficulty allowing others to feel their feelings. If someone feels bad, you rush in to make it better because you think it’s your fault. You worry about other people’s feelings frequently.”
Conscious: “You are able to be present and attentive when people around you are feeling their emotions. You encourage them to feel their emotions deeply and to express those feelings openly.”
2. Co-dependent: “In spite of your ‘best efforts’ people around you do not change their bad habits.”
Conscious: “You commit to stop enabling the bad habits of people you care about. Instead, you take effective actions that give people the opportunity to take full responsibility for their own well-being.”
3. Co-dependent: “You have secrets. There are things you have done or not done that you are hiding from another person.”
Conscious: “You have no secrets. You reveal rather than conceal. You understand that hiding your feelings causes you to withdraw from intimacy, and you take every opportunity to speak honestly about your feelings.”
4. Co-dependent: “You do not let yourself feel the full range of your feelings. You are out of touch with one or more core emotions such as anger, fear, or sadness. Anger is a particular problem for you. You find it hard to admit that you’re angry, and you have trouble expressing it to other people.”
Conscious: “You recognize the body sensations that let you know you’re angry. You communicate about all your feelings in a straightforward, easy manner that others can understand.”
5. Co-dependent: “You criticize or get criticized frequently. You have a strong, nagging internal critic that keeps you feeling bad even in moments when you could be feeling good.”
Conscious: “You experience very little criticism, either from outside or within. Your internal critic is in full retirement, having been replaced by a strong inner appreciator.”
6. Co-dependent: “You try to control other people, to get them to feel and be a certain way, and you spend a lot of energy being controlled or avoiding being controlled by others.”
Conscious: “You are aware of those things you can control and the things you cannot control. You put your attention on things you can change, such as expressing what’s true and keeping your agreements, and you make choices that support those areas you can actually influence.”
7. Co-dependent: “In arguments, much energy is spent in trying to find out whose fault it is. Both people struggle to prove that they are right, or to prove the other wrong.”
Conscious: “When difficulties or differences arise, you shift into wonder and healthy responsibility, asking, “Hmmm…, how am I creating this, and what could I do differently to create a better result?”
8. Co-dependent: “In arguments, you find yourself pleading victim or agreeing that you were at fault.”
Conscious: “You take full responsibility for the events that happen in your relationship. You invite the other person to take full responsibility, too. You understand that a relationship can only take place between two people who are equals, both taking full responsibility for events that occur; anything else is an entanglement, not a relationship.”
9. Co-dependent: “You frequently agree to do things you do not want to do, feel bad about it, but say nothing.”
Conscious: “You consider every agreement before making it, and listen closely to your body wisdom as well as your mind as to whether you should make it. You keep the agreements you make and know how to change an agreement that isn’t working.”




Picture: Birth of Venus (detail). Painting by S. Botticelli.

Keep an eye on the area in your chart in late PI / early AR (VENUS / CHIRON ‘resi-dance’ these days / months),  esp. if you have planets, Sun, Moon, AC, MC there.

These sides in you are called to spontaneity in the moment (ARIES), and to connect from love (PISCES).
Maybe for the first time in a long time???

How these energies are affecting you, and how you can be best aligned with them can be seen by consulting with your personal birth chart, based on your birth date, time, and place, its unique pattern, and, foremost:

It depends on how YOU live from the energies of your chart (that’s why I find it’s so important to work with clients in person, and I refuse doing written reports).

If you feel a resonance, and hear the call to work with me come for a 1-on-1 consult session (incl. an initial 1 hr orientation session), or let’s co-design a sequence of sessions that would serve you best: Intentionality and commitment have by nature deeper effects. 

We can go into the heart of the matter, and draw out what’s possible to help you change from within.


© 2017 by Melanie Lichtinger




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